AWKWARD

On an otherwise normal Friday afternoon I popped in on TSandler5000 at work. I thought I’d try to get him to play hooky for the rest of the afternoon. But he gave me some cock and bull story about “needing to make a few calls” and “shooting out a couple more emails.” Because he is so busy and important he can’t just pick up and leave, even on a Friday. I was starting to feel bad for him, Friday afternoon… before a holiday weekend… that kicks off the last weekend of Summer…the markets are already closed for two hours; and poor 5000 is locked up in a cubical chained to the laptop. When all of the sudden, there is a commotion four rows of cubes away. Like a ground hog in whack-a-mole, an Israeli pops up above his cubical; he is holding a microphone. Everyone starts clapping and laughing, music starts playing. I look to 5000, he is beat red, embarrassed, and starting to pack up his bag and quickly shut down his computer. “Let’s go,” he says. Being the astute individual I am I sense something is going on that 5000 doesn’t want me to see. Then I hear it, a warbled and heavily accented voice, cracking and straining to hit the opening note, “All my bags, are packed, I’m ready to go…” applause erupts out of the left side of the room, now there are eight to ten whack-a-moles popping up around the room. “I’m standing here, outside your door,” the Israeli continues. 5000 swings his bag on his shoulder and goes to lead me out of the cube, he acts as if he can’t here the singing.
“Karaoke?” I say. “Karaoke?” 5000 actually tries to pretend he didn’t notice the Karaoke party that just ensued.
“Please,” he says eyes begging, “don’t tell anyone.”
“Me?” I smile, “Who would I tell?”